You didn’t think I would really let the Oscars rest without announcing the worst dressed did you? Well, I’m not. I did want to watch the Fashion police before I made my final decision to see if we agree but unfortunately we do not. Don’t get me wrong, their worst dressed is on my list as well (Ahm.. Charlize Theron) but I don’t think that she was the worst of the worst. So let’s get down to business and start going down the line:
Sarah Jessica Parker, I’m sorry honey but you look like a tampon. And not just a regular tampon, one of those silky gentle glide ones. Diane Kruger totally missed the target this time, and by target I mean chicken coup. Vera Farmiga, you may have starred aside one of Hollywood’s leading men, but didn’t stop you from wrapping a giant fuchsia table cloth around you did it. Oh Zoe Saldana in Givenchy couture, you make me so sad. I really really like you but you look like giant purple piniata full of sparkles and rainbows. Maggie Gyllenhaal is getting ready to eat some sushi and Charlize Theron got two cinnabuns on her boobies (Thanks for that Joan).
Here’s another thing I wanted to mention. Dear celebrities, please make sure you call each other and verify what everyone’s wearing before you show up looking like this… Thank you.
I really really like Amanda Seyfried (Mostly due to Dear John, thank you for making me cry my eyes out) but both her and Jennifer Lopez (Which by the way was a best dressed nominee on Fashion Police) looked like they were wearing that cellophane stuff, you know the stuff you wrap your valuables in when you move. Oh and Mariah Carey and Gabourey Sidibe. It’s not that they looked bad, it’s just that they didn’t look that great. Granted Gaby looks the best she has ever looked in her porn “money dress” but I could definitely go without Mariah’s ‘Picked it at up at Ross on my way here’ dress. You’re not that skinny any more girl, deal with it.
I know I always write only about what the girls are wearing. What can I say, I am a girl, and when I see pretty dresses my eyes get really wide and I start to drool a little bit. So this time I would like to show you exactly why I never write about the guys.
The picture to the left here, is the reason why. BORING! Some of the hottest stars like Chris Pine, Jake Gyllenhaal, Ryan Reynolds, Taylor Lautner, Bradley Cooper and Gerard Butler showed up sporting a black tux with a black bow tie. Common people… you have billion of dollars and you can’t get anymore creative than a black tux and a black bow-tie?
And they weren’t the only ones. Other bow-tie sporting dudes include George Clooney, Matt Damon, Robin Thicke, Jason Bateman and Tom Ford. Yes there might have been some individuals that broke the bow-tie barrier and wore a skinny tie but that just wasn’t enough to revive the lack of color at this year’s Academy Awards.
The only guy that somewhat surprised was Robert Downey Jr. when he showed up with a black tux, a turquoise bow-tie, sneakers and blue see through shades. Good one, but not very appropriate.
Now this is my favorite part of an Award Show! Who wore what, who wore it best and who wore it worst is in some cases more important than who won. The Academy Awards is probably the most important of the award shows and it’s very important to look classy, sassy and fabulous. The theme of the night was definitely all about the sparkle and the flow.
From seasoned actresses like Demi Moore in Atelier Versace, Penelope Cruz in Donna Karan couture, Cameron Diaz in Oscar de la Renta, Elizabeth Banks in Versace and Rachel McAdams in Elie Saab Haute couture, to the younger players on the field like Kristen Stewart in Monique Lhuillier (Finally she looks stunning… I was getting a little worried with her funky little outfits), Miley Cyrus in Jenny Packham and Anna Kendrick in Elie Saab, all looked absolutely phenomenal. But who took the cake? That will be the crowd favorite, Sandra Bullock, who also picked up a little gold man for Best Leading Actress in The Blind Side. Bullock’s beaded Marchesa gown won over the Academy and the Fashion Police in both elegance and and glam.
The Academy Awards, also known as the Oscars, is not only known for it’s importance and the life long statement “I’d like to thank the Academy”, but also for it’s funny. And this year, none other than Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin brought the funny. The show started off with our favorite mini doctor, Neil Patrick Harris, singing and dancing his little heart out with two half naked rockettes.
Over the course of the night, the hosts made sure they put their two cents in and I was sitting with the laptop and writing it all down. Here are some of their Gems:
Steve: “There’s Damn Helen Mirren”… Alec: “That’s dame Helen Mirren”
Alec about Woody Harrelson: “He is sooo high!”
“There’s James Cameron” – ‘Both put on 3D glasses’
Steve: “Inglorious bastards’ Christoph Waltz is a Nazi obsessed with finding Jews – Well here is the motherload”
Steve: “The Academy awards… the best night in Hollywood since last night”
Alec: “Hey Feriss… is this your day off???”
What else happened? The star of Precious, Gabourey Sidibe, told Ryan Seacrest “If Fashion was Porn… this dress is the money job!”… The only time that Mr. Smith dramatically inhaled was when they showed the horror movie slide… and George Clooney was clearly pissed off about something all night.
I’ll admit it. I have never actually watched this show before. I am slowly catching up with all the random reality shows that are out there for our viewing pleasure. So why am I watching it this season? Well, while watching The Bachelor’s “After the Final Rose” show with Chris Harrison, the new lineup for Dancing With The Stars was announced, and surprise surprise…our very own ‘no longer bachelor’ Jake Pavelka will be shaking his tiny pilot booty along with the other “stars”.
Now before I go any further, I have to say that I am a little bit upset. Mr. Pavelka is just kind of annoying to me now, yes we get it… you are head over heels in love with a cross eyed idiot with no fashion sense. We get it! Shut up already. The other thing that bothers me, is that he is paired up with one of the most talented and amazing dancers I have ever seen. Chelsie Hightower was one of the semi finalists on the 4th season of So You Think You Can Dance and I love love love her! Plus… look at the picture, unlike every single couple in the gallery below, Jake and Chelsie are not even touching each other… isn’t that weird? Maybe Vienna told him that she’ll cut off his manhood or something. I wouldn’t put it past her. Now lets go to the other 10 contestants shall we:
Aiden Turner – Personally, I have never heard of him until today. And today is a pretty good day. This steaming hot British guy is not just a Soap Opera star ladies, he is a chef, a DJ, a world traveler and now a Dancing With The Stars contestant. Does it get any better than that? Well he is paired up with Polish ballroom dancer Edyta Sliwinska, so lets see if he can add professional dancer to his resume.
Buzz Aldrin – He might have been the second man on the moon but his dance talent is still a mystery. Until today. Buzz is no longer just an astronaut, scientist, inventor and best-selling author. You’d think that he would be enough for him but it’s not. Hey, some people just want to shoot the moon. (:-) I made a funny). Fun Fact #1: In case you were wondering, Toy Story’s Buzz Lightyear, was in fact named after yours truly. Fun Fact #2: The MTV Music Video Award, “The Moonman” was originally called “The Buzzy” and is shaped in his image. Buzz is paired up with self-proclaimed “Utah County Mormon”, Ashly Costa. So shake your groove thang, you 80 year old spaceman, I’m rooting for you.
Chad Ochocinco – That’s an interesting name you say? Well, his real name is actually Chad Johnson, but it was legally changed to Ochocinco (85 in Spanish) because that is his jersey number. How original. Ochocinco is an NFL wide receiver, completing his ninth season with the Cincinnati Bengals. He holds the franchise record for most receiving yards in a season, most receiving yards of all time, the most receptions, the most receiving yards in a game, the most seasons with over 1,000 receiving yards and the most touchdowns in a game. Wow… try saying that in one breath. Paired up with the first two-time DWTS champion Cheryl Burke, he might have a pretty good shot at this dancing thing too.
Erin Andrews – Probably the prettiest sideline reporter ESPN has, Erin has given it to you straight from the network’s NHL coverage, ESPN College Football Saturday telecasts, Saturday Prime-time college basketball games, Big Ten college basketball coverage, ESPN College Football Primetime series on Thursday nights and added Major League Baseball sideline reporting to her responsibilities, including the Monday Night Baseball telecasts. But don’t catalog her as a tomboy… Erin graduated from the University of Florida where she was a member of the Gators’ basketball dance team from 1997-2000. Paired up with Ukrainian Latin Ballroom dance champion, choreographer and instructor Maksim Chmerkovskiy. Let’s see if these two can make some magic together.
I know normally when there is an award show, I pick the movies or actors that I hope will win. But lets face it… That rarely happens. So this time I decided to just pick who I think is going to win. I noticed that with all award shows, you get two or three movies that just win everything. So here you go guys… I really hope I guessed em’ all. Who do you think is going to win? Did I make the right picks?
Best Picture – Avatar, The Blind Side, District 9, An Education, The Hurt Locker, Inglorious Bastards,
Precious, A Serious Man, Up, Up In The Air
Actor In Leading Role – Jeff Bridges, George Clooney, Colin Firth, Morgan Freeman, Jeremy Renner
Actor In Supporting Role – Matt Damon, Woody Harrelson, Christopher Plummer, Stanley Tucci, Christoph Waltz
Actress In Leading Role – Sandra Bullock, Helen Mirren, Carey Mulligan, Gabourey Sidibe, Meryl Streep
Actress In Supporting Role – Penelope Cruz, Vera Farmiga, Maggie, Gyllenhaal, Anna Kendrick, Mo’Nique
Animated Feature Film – Coraline, Fantastic Mr. Fox, The Princess and the Frog, The Secret of Kells, Up
There have been many rumors floating around,that Simon Cowell has in fact proposed to his girlfriend Mezhgan Hussainy. These rumors had been somewhat put to rest by Simon Cowell’s publicist Max Clifford two weeks ago, when he said that he spoke to Simon in London and asked him: “Look, are you engaged? Is it true?” and Simon said “No! No. I’m not engaged.” Well it might have been true then, but now I’m not so sure.
In the picture to the right, you can see American Idol producer and judge, Simon Cowell (50), with his recent main squeeze, Afghan-born American Idol make up artist Mezhgan Hussainy (36), at Sony Music offices in Beverly Hills, CA. on February 28th. What’s in the top right corner you ask? Well that would be the huge diamond ring that Hussainy was sporting on that special ring finger.
That huge rock might be a statement all on it’s own… but we would still like an official announcement! Thanks in advance Mr. Cowell.
It seems that Showbiz star Marie Osmond’s 18 year old son, Michael Blosil, has leaped to his death off the roof of his L.A. apartment Friday night. Blosil was one of the five children that Marie Osmond and ex-husband Brian Blosil adopted. Michael reportedly suffered from depression and even entered a rehab center for undisclosed reasons back in 2007.
Osmond released the following statement on Saturday evening: “My family and I are devastated and in deep shock by the tragic loss of our dear Michael and ask that everyone respect our privacy during this difficult time.” Only a few years ago, Marie was fighting accusations made by the National Enquirer that she herself had attempted suicide in 2006, and had been hospitalized in Utah.
As of now Donnie and Marie have canceled their Las Vegas show at the Flamingo hotel and are waiting to receive news regarding Blosil’s autopsy that will take place Sunday.
James Bond – Sexy secret agent man known for his womanizing ways… oh and of course saving the world from eminent doom. Created by novelist Ian Fleming and externalized as the ultimate ladies man by millions of people for the past 48 years, James Bond is the coolest manly man to ever walk the Earth. And just as every manly man has to have a female counterpart, James Bond has the Bond girl. After all, one dream that every aspiring actress has is to die in the arms of James Bond.
These courageous ladies are far from shy and definitely far from ugly. The typical Bond Girl is in her early to mid-twenties, roughly ten years younger than Bond, who seems to be in his mid-thirties. Bond Girls also have a degree of independence even though they are clearly intended as sex objects. They are often victims rescued by Bond, fellow agents or allies, villains or members of an enemy organization, most typically the villain’s accomplice, assistant or mistress. Some are mere eye candy and have no direct involvement in Bond’s mission, and other Bond Girls play a pivotal role in the success of the mission.
To date, only two Bond Girls have actually captured James Bond’s heart. The first, Tracy Draco (Diana Rigg), married Bond in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969) but was later shot dead at the end of the movie. The second, was Vesper Lynd (Eva Green) in Casino Royale (2006), but unfortunately she committed suicide by drowning herself in a canal in Venice. So what’s the morale of these stories? Well James Bond is just destined to roam the earth in search of the next global disaster and a vixen to help him save the world. Or at least help him take his mind off of things for a night or two.
How lucky can one man get? Every movie has a main Bond girl, sometimes one or two secondary Bond girls and a Bond villain who is normally the main villain’s henchwoman… and Bond gets to sleep with all of them. Some of the most famous secondary Bond girls and Bond villains include Grace Jones, Famke Janssen, Halle Berry, Teri Hatcher and Sophie Marceau and you can bet there’s going to be many more to come.
Tiger Woods… Oh my god really? This has gone on almost as long as the Gosselin family crap. I already said I’m not going to write about this useless drama, but I did read some articles that were absolutely hilarious, and I couldn’t have said it better my self. These snippets come from a site called The Superficial which I’m pretty sure is written by a guy (Correct me if I’m wrong). Enjoy…
Newlywed Bachelor couple Jason Mesnick and Molly Malaney look happy at a date night in Hollywood Monday – the same evening their wedding special aired on ABC
March 11, 2010, at 4:57 pm
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